Susan V's Thai Coconut Soup with Tofu and Mushrooms (and some extra veggies, cause hey; I gotta live up to this blog's name ;-)

Sunday:
Exercise: (throughout the day) 30 min walk with Cammie, 30 min treadmill, 30 min flexibility workout (Y!F), 30 min walk with Cammie
Food: not awesome, but not horrible

Saturday:
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie, 30 min core workout (Y!F)
Breakfast: Smoothie (spinach, cherries, banana, flax, cocoa powder, water)
Activity: Yard Work
Lunch: a couple salt potatoes with ketchup
Dinner: Salad (romaine, quorn naked cutlet, sliced almonds, raspberry balsamic dressing); mushrooms; raw brownies
Fuhrmometer: 8 - Eggplant

slight improvement

Friday:
Breakfast: Smoothie
Lunch: pizza crusts...
Dinner: Salad (romaine, raspberry balsamic, quorn naked cutlet, almonds); 3 small salt potatoes with ketchup, raw brownies
Exercise: rest day
Fuhrmometer: 6 - blueberry

can i have a do-over?

Thursday:
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie, 30 min upper body workout (Y!F)
Breakfast: Smoothie
Lunch: mock chicken salad wrap from HFS
Dinner: eggplant parmesan sub, ice cream sandwich
Fuhrmometer: 3 - Cashew

Thank you Mary for keeping me accountable and making me post - I was attempting to slide under the radar but you are too good!

I don't know what happened yesterday, I have no good reasons or excuses for eating the way I did and I do feel bad about it and wish I could take it back. I can say that I noticed two things - 1. the food isn't worth it and I get much more enjoyment and "feel good" out of eating healthily and 2. I don't really like cheese anymore - I peeled most of it off of my sub - so that is some progress.

Today I am back on track and I will post again tonight to prove it.

Wednesday:
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie, 30 min cardio workout (Y!F)
Breakfast: Smoothie (36ish oz) Spinach, blueberries, strawberries, 1/2 banana, flax, water
Lunch: 1/2 Bowl Springtime Soup
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie
Dinner: Salad (romaine, raspberry balsamic dressing, quorn naked cutlet); Raw Brownies
Fuhrmometer: 9 - broccoli

Today I am craving Thai Food, I'm not going to have it but I do want it... really badly. I know that there are many things that are more important than Thai Food, including the fact that I can realistically meet the -100 lbs mark within the next few weeks if I am extremely dedicated and diligent and that is something that will be really exciting. I don't want to eat anything that will lead to me feeling guilty or defeated or set me back in any way to meet this milestone.

Tuesday:
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie, 30 min flexibility workout (Y!F)
Breakfast: Smoothie
Lunch: 1/2 bowl Springtime Soup
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie
Dinner: Salad - lettuce, hummus, wasabi wonton strips; Raw Brownies
Fuhrmometer: 8.5 - eggplant/broccoli

Today I realized that I can be satisfied on less than what I planned to eat, and that I don't have to force myself to realize that. For someone who has been an over eater for pretty much all of her life this is pretty cool. I was eating my lunch and just came to a point where I was satiated and realized that I could save the other half of my soup for lunch tomorrow.

It's not that I would or should feel bad if I had eaten the entire thing - but the fact that I don't have to force myself to stop if I want to or need to and can listen to what my body really wants/needs. I've never been one of those people who could stop eating a restaurant meal in the middle just because. It always was a conscious effort to not look like a pig in front of others. I never understood how people could do that or leave food on their plate but now I am starting to get it. And that's really cool to me.

Weigh In

Monday:
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie, 30 min core (Y!F)
Breakfast: Smoothie (spinach, blueberries, strawberries, banana, flax, water)
Lunch: some portobello - onion - broccoli rabe soup
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie
Dinner: Salad (field greens, shredded carrot, hummus), quorn naked cutlet on 1/2 whole wheat pita with tomato and onion, ice cream sandwich
Exercise: 15:20 running on tm
Fuhrmometer: 8 - eggplant

Weight today is 215.0 which is down 2.8 from 2 weeks ago and down about 5 from last Monday (after 4 or 5 days of junk and no workouts). I'm pleased with it and since a lot of the craziness at work is over for now I know that I'll have no excuses for not sticking with the program. :-)

Edit: I wish I had remembered what I wrote this morning when I decided to have an ice cream sandwich after dinner! I did remember about half way through eating it and decided to go run it off on the treadmill. I'm glad I did [decide to do that], it felt good to really work hard. However, in the future I want to eat without feeling guilty about it (because it's good food and not crap) and work out hard because I can and am fit enough to do it.

weekend flog

Weekend:
Saturday:
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie, 30 min Cardio workout (Y!F)
Breakfast: Smoothie (spinach, cherries, banana, chia seeds, cocoa powder, water)
Exercise Strenuous Activity: 5 hours of gardening/yard work
Dinner: sesame tofu and rice
Fuhrmometer: 6.5 blueberry/lentil

Sunday:
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie, 30 min upper body (Y!F)
Breakfast: Smoothie (spinach, cherries, banana, flax, cocoa powder, water)
Lunch: fresh spring rolls (not the fried kind), curry rice with veggies
Dinner: Salad (Quorn Naked Cutlet with lettuce, tomatoes, cucumber, red onion and balsamic)
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie
Fuhrmometer: ?

Edit: For some reason comments aren't appearing for this post... strange!

the superiority that is the salad

The college I work for had graduation yesterday, this was me!

I felt awesome all day despite runs in my stockings :-) At lunch/dinner in between the Graduate and Undergraduate ceremonies we went to an Italian restaraunt where their most popular dish is spaghetti parmesan - yup, pasta with sauce covered in tons of mozzerella cheese and broiled. I am happy to say that I had a salad and it was wonderful - mixed greens with big chunks of apple, dried cherries, walnuts, red onion and a little bit of crumbly blue cheese (I picked off a bunch of the blue cheese) and balsamic vinegar for dressing! When the server brought me my salad everyone at the table (there were 14 of us) oohed and aahed over my salad. It was awesome. The best part was after dinner when we were heading back for the evening ceremony and everyone was complaining about how stuffed they felt and I felt awesome :-)

How to Smoothie

Thursday:
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie, 30 min flexibility workout (Y!F)
Breakfast: The Smoothie
Lunch: none
Dinner: Salad (lettuce, hummus, cucumber, red onion), 1/2 whole wheat pita with Quorn Naked Cutlet, tomato and red onion; raw brownies
Fuhrmometer: 8 - eggplant

---

Yesterday Tara asked for more details about my smoothies. So here goes:

On the weekend I put together my smoothie kits for the week, so in the mornings all I have to do is quickly defrost the kit in the microwave for 1 minute and then throw everything in the VitaMix and viola!

I use a digital kitchen scale to make sure things are roughly the same and that the finished product fills up my Nalgene wide-mouth bottles:

8 oz frozen spinach (Dr. Fuhrman says to count the same as fresh)
5 oz frozen blueberries
1/2 banana
enough strawberries to make 1lb 4oz or 20oz total weight
flax (1Tb ground or 2Tb whole)

2 cups of water or 1 16.9 oz bottle

Sometimes I do change things up but this is what I stick with most of the time due to the ease of getting the ingredients goodness from the berries and spinach.

desserts and dresses

Wednesday:
Exercise: short walk with Cammie (it started raining), 25 min on treadmill, 40ish min Core workout (Y!F)
Breakfast: Smoothie (spinach, blueberries, strawberries, 1/2 banana, flax, water)
Lunch: 1/2 bowl of mushroom - onion - broccoli rabe soup
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie
Dinner: Salad (baby greens, cucumber, red onion, greek inspired dressing), Raw Brownies
Fuhrmometer: 9 - Broccoli

The other day I had a Lara Bar with lunch. It was a chocolate coconut Lara Bar to be specific. I can remember the first time I had a Lara Bar and how it was the most awesome thing that I had ever tasted and I couldn't believe that it was all natural and (kind of) allowed on ETL. It really did taste like a brownie to me.

Then a while back I read about Raw Brownies made with dates, walnuts and cocoa powder. I made them and again could not believe how good and decadent they were. The other day was the first time since discovering the Raw Brownies that I had a Lara Bar, and as much as I love Lara Bars and the fact that they are out there creating all natural food - I have to say it just didn't compare.

I think that I prefer the Raw Brownies to pretty much every other sweet that exists, which is cool because it's a really sensible way to not feel deprived of "normal" food (junk) which I still struggle with from time to time.

Like recently with all of the stress of work I would go home and want to share a meal with hubby - which last week meant things like pizza, or burgers (veggie burgers for me) on the grill, and ice cream. It is something that I need to figure out how to get over.

To completely change topics but not really, this morning when I was on the treadmill I tried to visualize how I want to be/look/feel when I reach my goal to help get me refocused and motivated. I couldn't think of anything in particular but did think about how I don't want to be stuck where I am for long - clothing wise I'm on the very edge of being able to shop in the "normal" stores and I'd really like to get firmly into that territory sooner than later. I can see a huge milestone (100 lbs lost) in the distance and would really like to get there and to "Onederland" soon as well. I'll be seeing family this summer that I haven't seen for a year or two and it would be really nice to say "yeah, I've lost 100 pounds since June 06..."

But then when I got to work this morning and checked one of my favorite non-food or weight loss blogs A Dress A Day, and I saw it, a beautiful dress that I could just picture my goal self in and I knew that I have to have that dress and that I have to get to my goal so that I can feel good in a dress like that. It's the entire motivational package.

Now I just have to remember that dress before giving in to eating the kind of junk that I have been eating, because a cookie may provide a few minutes of pleasure - but dresses definitely last much longer.

Sorry!

Tuesday:
Exercise: 20 min treadmill, 30 min upper body workout (Y!F)
Breakfast: Smoothie (Spinach, blueberries, strawberries, 1/2 banana, flax, water)
Lunch: small package of croutons (no clue why), 1/2 bowl of mushroom - onion - broccoli rabe soup
Exercise: nice long walk with the doggie
Dinner: falafel sandwich, ice cream sandwich
Fuhrmometer: 7ish

Ok, so mid last week I gave up. I was just too stressed out to deal with anything and gave in to eating for comfort. Since Sunday I've been trying to get back on track and today I'm doing pretty well; I feel confident that I'm back from this stumble - I need some new clothes and have decided that I'm going to go shopping when I hit the 90 pounds lost mark. ;-)

Recipe coming soon!

Sunday:
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie, 16 min jogging on TM, 30 min Flexibility (Y!F)
Breakfast/Lunch: Smoothie (Spinach, Cherries, Banana, Cocoa Powder, Flax, Water)
Dinner: potato chips, Salad (mixed greens, greek inspired dressing, falafel), small bit of ice cream
Fuhrmometer: too tired to decide right now

I have stuff to say, I'm just too tired to say it right now. I haven't given up, things have just been a little out of control lately. I promise I'll be back tomorrow with a better post.

Wednesday:
Breakfast: Smoothie (spinach, blueberries, strawberries, 1/2 banana, flax, water)
Lunch:
Exercise:
Dinner:
Fuhrmometer:

It’s just disgusting. It’s got to stop. Eating processed, prepared, dairy/salt/oil/sugar laden foods that is. I’ve had enough of being involuntarily drawn to their evil effects and I’m done.

Yesterday I would classify as a binge. I had one tiny bite of that sweet either pumpkin or orange bread with chocolate chips in it and it was like a switch was flipped and I had to have more. It was the same thing with the chips and salsa – which in theory aren’t too bad but contained way way way too much salt and oil I’m sure and made me feel really ill after eating them. I scolded myself for not eating my soup which I had brought for lunch and I know would have made me feel good instead of feeling like I wanted to vomit. I did not like myself much yesterday.

Today those same foods are available. Today I am just as busy (if not busier) than I was yesterday. Today I’m not going to eat that crap. I’m not going to tomorrow either. It’s just not worth it. I’ve got perfectly tasty food of my own to eat which I know will make me feel good and feel good about myself too.

I know that there will be times when I will choose and plan to eat “off plan” foods; but it’s more of an issue of control than anything else. Yesterday I felt like the choices I was making were out of my own conscious control and that totally sucks. I know that if I plan something ahead and am in full control of it I will make better decisions about what to eat and won’t feel as psychologically bad about it and won’t adopt the “screw it” mentality.

But for now and for 98% of the time I’m sticking to ETL friendly food only. There’s no other way to do it when considering that if I don’t I’m hurting myself in more ways than one.

chaos!

Tuesday:
Breakfast: Smoothie, Some Orange or Pumpkin bread thing
Lunch: tortilla chips and salsa, more of that bread stuff
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie, 30 min Core (Y!F), 5 minutes running on TM
Dinner: Smoothie (Spinach, raspberry, mango); falafel
Fuhrmometer: 6.5

This week my professional life is completely out of control. My hours are all messed up and I have more things that need to be done than I can count. I am determined to do my best and stay as normal as I can with my eating and working out. I probably won't have too much of a chance to get to comment for anyone this week - but I am thinking of all of you!

Monday:
Breakfast/Lunch: Smoothie, Falafel
Lunch/Dinner: Springtime Soup, Falafel

Weight today is 217.8 which is 2.2 pounds less than last week - decent.

I am inhumanly busy today so I'll be back with more tomorrow. :-)

Sunday:
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie, 30 min Upper Body (Y!F), 30 min treadmill
Breakfast/Lunch: (at 12) Smoothie (spinach, cherries, banana, flax, cocoa powder)
Snack: (at 5ish) orange
Exercise: 45 min walk with Cammie
Dinner: (at 8:30) Salad (romaine, falafel, cucumber, red onion, dressing), 1/2 whole wheat pita, raw brownies
Fuhrmometer: 9.5 Brocco-Kale

Just a sweet spring day :-)
Nicole’s ETL-friendly Falafel
Makes 24 Falafel

Time consuming? Maybe a little. Worth it? You bet.

6 cups cooked, drained & cooled chickpeas/ garbonzo Beans (about 1 lb dry)
1 bunch green onions
3-4 cloves garlic
¼ cup fresh parsley
6 Tbsp ground flax
½ cup wheat germ
¼ cup whole wheat breadcrumbs (grind up some toasted low sodium bread or pita in the food processor)
1 tsp paprika
1 Tbsp ground cumin
1 Tbsp ground coriander
1 tsp ground turmeric
2 – 4 Tbsp Braggs Liquid Aminos (to taste)
¼ Cup tahini (raw and unsalted)
1 Tbsp lemon juice
Water as needed (can use reserved bean cooking water)

The food processor is your best friend with these, although not 100% necessary.

1. In the food processor pulse cooled chickpeas until ground up but not pulverized (see the texture in the picture?) or if not using a food processor just mash them up. Set aside.
2. In food processor or blender make a paste with the green onions, garlic, and parsley. Set aside.
3. Add wheat germ, flax, breadcrumbs, cumin, coriander, and turmeric to chickpeas and stir to combine.
4. Add green onion, garlic, and parsley and stir to combine.
5. Stir in Braggs, tahini, and lemon juice – at this point the mixture should start to come together and be able to hold together into balls. If not, add water 1 Tbsp at a time until it does.
6. Cover and refrigerate for a few hours or overnight for flavors to come together.
7. Preheat oven to 300. Make ¼ cup patties and place on wax paper or parchment lined baking sheet (will need two sheets or two batches). Cook for 15 minutes, turn and cook for additional 15 minutes until firm.

Greek Inspired Dressing
Yeilds ~2 Cups

1/3 cup lemon juice
1/3 cup tahini
1/3 cup water
1 clove garlic
1 tsp dried dill
Any other Greek-style herbs that strike your fancy
1 Cup Chia Gel(Grind the Chia Seeds first!)

Combine all ingredients and blend well in a blender. Is even better when it’s spent the night in the fridge!

Saturday:
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie, 30 min Cardio (Y!F)
Breakfast: Smoothie (spinach, cherries, banana, cocoa powder, flax, water)
Lunch: eggo
Dinner: Corona, a couple tortilla chips, salad with falafel, raw brownies
Fuhrmometer: 8 Eggplant

Yesterday was bad; today is better already :-)

girl stuff

Friday:
Exercise: Rest Day, 30 min walk with Cammie
Breakfast: that damn snack mix from yesterday, smoothie
Lunch: a couple crackers with dip
Dinner: chinese food
Fuhrmometer: 3 - Cashew

So I've never outwardly blamed my lack of weight loss in a particular week on my cycle... until now. I did mess up on Monday by eating cereal and snacking before breakfast (or did my smoothie become the snack, hmm). But until today the rest of the week has been decent. And yet this week's weight loss doesn't compare to last weeks in the least... so I'm blaming it on... it.

I guess I should have seen it coming with the urge to snack and my complete meltdown on Tuesday and been prepared for all of the fun side effects but I just wasn't. At any rate it's still been a good week with hitting the halfway point and most likely hitting the -80 mark (and a little more by Monday hopefully!), so I can't really complain.

Another not so bad thing - ever since starting ETL my cycle has become much more predictable (which I take as a sign of returning health) and I've noticed my symptoms (the moodiness and cravings and all of that stuff you see in the midol commercials) much more than I ever used to. The good thing about this that I realized this morning is that they were probably there all along but I used to feel so crappy all the time that I never really noticed a particular difference. Now that I feel good almost all the time I really notice when I'm not in a good mood or don't feel good.

It's amazing to me that I'm almost a year into Eating to Live and I'm still having these epiphanys about how bad I used to feel and how much things have improved. It's great incentive not to go back to where I was before!

dress dreaming

Thursday:
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie, 30 min Flexibility workout (Y!F)
Breakfast: Smoothie (spinach, blueberries, strawberries, 1/2 banana, flax, water)
Lunch: Springtime Soup
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie
Dinner: Salad (romaine, cucumber, falafel, greek inspired dressing), raw brownies
Fuhrmometer: 9.5 broccoli/kale

Sometimes I think that I'm going to bring my camera into the office so that I can take pictures of the things that hang around here and sometimes tempt me. For an office where everyone is actively either trying to maintain or lose weight and/or be healthier (utilizing various methods) there seem to be a lot of sweets and other junk foods around here.

Today there was a bag of snack mix stuff in the kitchen that the vending machine guy left for us which was trying to tempt me (it didn't do a very good job). I usually alternate between being tempted by the junk to being angry that it's there to wanting to throw it all away (because it's not healthy for ANYONE is it). But today I feel like I have a grip on things and can let them (the food that is) live in their own unhealthy world while I exist happily in my healthy, getting thinner, feeling good world.

I'm going to go shopping for a dress to wear to Graduation soon and am looking forward to it much more than I probably should! I really like the Dress of the Week dress and want to go try it on, hopefully it will fit and if it doesn't I won't feel too bad about it! But anyway, the thought of that dress definitely is helping me stay on the straight and narrow - every little bit helps!

half way!

Wednesday:
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie, 30 min lower body workout (Y!F)
Breakfast: Smoothie
Lunch: Springtime Soup, apple with cinnamon
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie
Dinner: Salad (romaine, falafel, greek inspired dressing)
Fuhrmometer: 9.5 broccoli/kale

Woo Hoo! I now officially have less to lose than I've already lost! Yeah!

This morning my boss called me into her office to see if I was ok (because of yesterday's meltdown). I said that I was much better, and she asked me if I've been running (she's a runner) I told her about how I've been going easy on my knees since I hurt my right knee in January and that I want to get down a little more before I start running so that I don't permanently damage my knees and hips, but my workouts have been good. I also told her that I hit my halfway point today. We talked about a couple of other work things and I came back to my office, do a couple of things, and check my email and this is what I see:

(To the office:)

Congratulations Nicole on reaching your Half-way to your goal milestone!!! I am so impressed with your dedication and diligence! You are an inspiration.

Great Job!!!

Luckily, only 6 other people work in my office so I was only slightly mortified! No really, it was very sweet and my co-workers are all great. Did I ever mention that my admin assistant gave me a bag of lentils for an Easter gift instead of chocolate? Yeah, that's how great these people are. It's really nice.

Thanks to all of my internet-based buddies and co-ETLers too! And of course Hubby! Without such a supportive environment who know's where I'd be? It doesn't matter because I'm here and it's awesome!

i think i'm solar powered

Tuesday:
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie, 30 min Core workout (Y!F)
Breakfast: Smoothie
Lunch: none
Dinner: pita with hummus, salad (romaine, cucumber, falafel, greek inspired dressing), raw brownies
Fuhrmometer: 9 Broccoli

Today was a bad day, there is so much stress at work right now and I ended up leaving early because I couldn't stay there any longer. I really wanted to give in to my urge to eat horribly bad food (pop tarts!?!) but didn't and am happy that I stuck with ETL foods.

It's funny that even though I didn't eat bad stuff today just thinking about it before makes me feel now like I cheated. I don't know why that is; but I guess it's another step in transitioning to making this "diet" into an actual lifestyle. Sooner or later (hopefully sooner) I'll feel about junk food the way I feel about eating meat - that is, have no desire to!

Weigh Day

Monday:
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie
Breakfast: Before Work: 1 bite of falafel, small bowl of honey nut cheerios, 1 small raw brownie. At Work: Smoothie
Lunch: Springtime Soup, fuji apple with cinnamon
Exercise: 70 min walk with Cammie
Dinner: Salad (romaine, falafel, cucumber, tomatoes, Greek-inspired dressing)
Fuhrmometer: 8.5 eggplant/broccoli (for snacking this morning!)

My weight this morning was 220.0 which is down 5.4 pounds from last Monday. Pretty good! (Have you noticed I'm almost halfway there?)

I had a slight misstep this morning with eating before work - I wasn't even hungry. I was tired and sore from a very active weekend and the cheerios sounded really good, well they're almost stale and should be tossed. It's ok, I'm just moving on and am staying on track.

I think that last week I had too much grain. The barley in the soup at lunch and pita at dinner is just not necessary. This week I'm not going to have the pita with dinner. I'll freeze it and save it for a week where I don't have grains in my soup.

booty

Sunday:
Breakfast: Smoothie (spinach, cherries, banana, cocoa powder, flax, water)
Exercise: Mowed the lawn,30 min walk with Cammie, 30 min Cardio workout (Y!F); 15 min Yoga (Y!F)
Lunch: Salad (romaine, falafel, cucumber, tomatoes, homemade Greek Inspired Dressing); fuji apple sliced and sprinkled with cinnamon
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie
Dinner: romaine, "refried" beans, whole wheat pita; raw brownies
Fuhrmometer: 9 - Broccoli

Hubby and I went to the public market this weekend and scored some awesome deals:

$1 for this entire box of bananas! We weighed it when we got home and there were 17 pounds of bananas before we peeled and bagged them to be frozen. I think that these bananas will last for 2½ to 3 months worth of smoothies.

All this ginger – about 2 pounds - also for $1. It’s a good thing that this stuff can be frozen!

We also picked up a bushel of Fuji apples for $2, 3 bunches of green onions for $1, a big seedless cucumber for $1.25, a big container of cumin for $6.50, some garlic for $1 and other stuff that I’m forgetting. I can’t believe we didn’t go there until now, we went to a farmers market closer to our house last summer but didn’t think that there were any started up yet this year; well the public market is there all year round!

I also cooked yesterday and made some more Springtime Soup and took a stab at some ETL friendly Falafel. The falafel are ok, I think I need to tinker with the recipe some more and I’ll post it when I figure it out. I did make some dressing with chia gel which I will post soon.

Tomorrow’s another official weigh in, and I am so glad that I moved it from Sunday mornings to Monday mornings. This morning I was craving bad bad food and I have to say the only thing that kept me from having them was the knowledge that I have to post my weight tomorrow morning and I want to be happy with the number that I post.

flog!

Saturday:
Exercise: 60 min walk with Cammie, 30 min flexibility workout (Y!F)
Breakfast: Smoothie (spinach, cherries, banana, flax, cocoa)
Lunch: Romaine, "refried" beans, whole wheat pita; a couple doritos
Dinner: Springtime Soup, falafel
Fuhrmometer: Broccoli-ish (~9)

chia chia chia

Friday:
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie (it's rest day)
Breakfast: Smoothie (spinach, blueberries, strawberries, 1/2 banana, cocoa powder, flax, water)
Lunch: Springtime Soup with Chia Seeds
Dinner: romaine, "refried" beans, whole wheat pita; raw brownies
Fuhrmometer: 9.5 - broccoli/kale

I've been reading a lot about Chia Seeds over at the Dr.Fuhrman.com forums lately and I have to say that I'm sold. Apparently, chias are amazing. They are a good source of Omega 3 fatty acids like flax seed or hemp seed, they have the ability to absorb a ton of water and can be used in cooking as an oil analog or a flavor extender/ calorie displacer. Also, chias help keep one feeling satiated longer - do some Internet searches on them and read how Native Americans in the Southwest and Mexico used them when hunting and running and fighting etc. Nutritious, filling and fun/useful in the ETL kitchen. I had to get myself some!

Luckily my local HFS carried them so I got myself some today to play with. Since right now chias aren't as popular as flax and hemp, they are much more expensive than their counterparts, so I think that I'll be using them primairily to cook with rather than for my daily EFA's. I'm really interested in trying to make some salad dressings with Chia Gel, which I think I'll take a stab at this weekend.

Tonight is our *super fun* (read - not super fun at all) networking thing for work. It's at an italian restaraunt and I know I don't want to eat anything while I'm there so I sprinkled some chias on my soup to help keep me feeling full until I can get home and eat my salad. I'll let you know how that turns out.

artichoke happiness

Thursday:
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie, 30 min Core workout (Yourself!Fitness)
Breakfast: Smoothie (spinach, blueberries, strawberries, banana, flax, water)
Lunch: Springtime Soup
Dinner: Doritos, romaine with "refried" beans, whole wheat pita, raw brownies
Fuhrmometer: 8 - Eggplant

Yesterday was a good day in the sense that I stayed on plan, but I think that skipping breakfast and eating lunch earlier than normal and then a normal timed dinner kind of threw my body off a little bit. I was so tired this morning and had an entire internal dialogue about getting up to workout. First it was I'll just take today as my rest day, then I'll just take Cammie for a walk, then I'll take Cammie for a walk and do my core workout since I like them. I'm glad that I did get up and work out but I was still so tired. When I came downstairs after showering and getting dressed for work hubby said "You look tired" "I am" I said "But you also look thinner" He said. So it's worth it.

Work was grueling today until I had my soup and now I feel much better. Tonight after work we are going shopping for a suit jacket for me to wear to a work function tomorrow night, I'm looking forward to it. I'm also looking forward to a few weeks down the line when I'll be able to go shopping for a dress to wear to graduation (not mine, for the students at the college I work at). Fun!

Wednesday:
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie, 30 min Upper Body Workout (Y!F), 30 min treadmill
First Meal: (12:15ish) Oriental Salad - romaine, scallions, mandarin oranges, walnuts, cucumber with Ginger Sesame Dressing on the side.
Second Meal: (7:30ish) Romaine with "refried" beans, whole wheat pita, raw brownies
Fuhrmometer: 9 - Broccoli... I think

Since today is Administrative Professionals Day, our small office took our two admins to lunch at a very nice upscale restaraunt. My salad was great; they kindly substituted the crushed walnuts for chinese noodles for me and the waiter sent back my salad because they didn't put the dressing on the side before it even got to me. I dipped my fork into the dressing before stabbing at my veggies so I only had enough for what I needed. The dressing wasn't ideal but the rest of the salad was really great. It's something that I'd make at home - I'll have to work on a similar dressing.

This place that we went is known all over the region for its desserts. I mean; what they offer is really gourmet and generally not the type of food you would see in a smaller city like Rochester. These desserts are amazing. Everyone at the table ordered some dessert but not me! I didn't even feel bad as I sat there while everyone else ate their desserts. I know that if I wanted to I could have one (they have macaroons the size of baseballs), but would rather save it for a special occasion like my birthday or anniversary or something. Right now I feel so good about my eating, exercising, and weight loss that there is absolutely no temptation to go off plan - it's better than any dessert!

full of recipes

Tuesday:
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie
Breakfast: Smoothie (spinach, blueberries, strawberries, raspberries, 1/2 banana, flax, cocoa powder, water)
Lunch: Springtime Soup
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie, 30 min Yourself!Fitness
Dinner: "refried" beans on romaine, 1/2 homemade whole wheat pita; raw brownies
Fuhrmometer: 9.5 - Broccoli/Kale

Yesterday afternoon I found myself sitting in a classroom proctoring exams for two of my advisees and I'd finished the work I took with me to do. I'm not the type to sit there and stare off into space so I ended up doing (sort of) what I used to do in middle school when waiting for the rest of the class to finish the test; I doodled.

When I was in middle school I used to write lyrics to songs on the back of my test papers. My seventh grade history teacher thought this was very amusing and used to read them (not out loud). He was a cool guy. But this time I didn't feel like writing down lyrics to songs, I also didn't feel like drawing my dream house, which I have also been known to do. I wrote about food. I made up a recipe for soup that I am going to try out this weekend, I jotted down some ideas for salads and also some very fuzzy ideas for ETL-friendly muffins.

I thought about how frequently I like to go back and find a recipe I made and posted months ago and how it'd be so much more convenient if I had an index of links like other bloggers (Bree for example) do to make it easier to find them again. I decided that it's time for me to put together an index of recipes that I've posted too; so I created full of recipes. It only has 10 posts and 8 recipes right now; but it will grow.

Then I thought how cool it would be to make it into a community blog for all of my ETL bloggin' buddies who would like to contribute to post recipes to as well. There are ETL recipes on the member center at Dr. Fuhrman's website, and Susan V at Fat Free Vegan has a lot of great recipes too, how great would it be to have another resource for ETL friendly recipes? If anyone out there would like to contribute; let me know. If not, then it'll be my own little thing - it's cool either way!

Weigh-ins: The Return of the Scale

Monday:
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie, 30 min Yourself!Fitness
Breakfast: Smoothie (Spinach, Blueberries, Strawberries, Raspberries, 1/2 banana, flax, cocoa powder, water)
Lunch: 2/3 bowl Springtime Soup
Dinner: 1/3 bowl Springtime Soup, hummus and romaine in a pita; raw brownies
Fuhrmometer: 9 - Broccoli

So my weight today is the same as it was the last time I weighed in "officially" 10 days ago - 225.4. I am feeling really good about it because those 10 days were kind of turbulent, and I know I was up at least 3 pounds at one point - so even though I am kind of breaking even I know I've lost in the last few days and that's a success. I am still up a little bit from the -75 point but am confident I'll get back there in a few days and will kiss it goodbye (for bigger and better numbers) as I pass on through.

Yesterday Cammie and I were visiting my Mom & Dad and my Dad offered me some potato chips (he wasn't trying to sabotage me, just trying to be nice), I said "no thank you" without batting an eyelash. It was great! No temptation at all! Yay me!

Sunday:
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie, 30 min Yourself!Fitness
Breakfast: Smoothie (Spinach, Cherries, Banana, Cocoa Powder, Flax, water)
Lunch/Dinner: Romaine, Hummus, Homemade Pita
Exercise: 30 min walk with cammie
Fuhrmometer: 9.5 Broccoli/Kale

Today was a beautiful day :-)

Saturday:
Exercise: 30 min wakeup walk with Cammie, 30 min Yourself!Fitness, 30 min Treadmill
Breakfast/Lunch: Smoothie (Spinach, Cherries, 1/2 banana, flax, cocoa powder, water)
Dinner: romaine, "refried" beans, homemade salt free whole wheat pita
Fuhrmometer: 9.5 broccoli/kale

So I weigh myself every day; I know I shouldn't but I do. I think I ate pretty well yesterday with the exception of the pre-packaged salad dressing that I had on my lunch salad and I didn't get in any exercise. BUT STILL, I don't think that these things merited a gain from yesterday to today... weird!

A New Leaf

Friday:
Breakfast: Smoothie (Spinach, Kale, Blueberries, Strawberries, 1/2 banana, flax and water)
Lunch: Dole Spring Garden Salad Kit and Dole Leafy Romaine (that's TWO bags of salad!)
Dinner: Romaine with "refried" beans and scallions, homemade pita, smoothie (cherries, strawberries, kale, cocoa powder and water)
Exercise: rest day today
Fuhrmometer: 8.5 eggplant/broccoli

A phone conversation this morning between me and the hubs:

Me: I forgot my lunch today so I’m going to go to the store to get some lettuce for lunch and a couple of other things; do you want any groceries?

Hubby: (stuff he wants from the store) Yeah I thought you were going to say that you were going to go to Lori’s Natural Foods* – I see you’ve been there three times in the past three weeks.

Me: Nope, I’m turning over a new leaf.

Hubby: Promise?

Me: Yup.

…blah blah blah not important…

Hubby: Well maybe summer is your time to shine and winter is your time to maintain.

Me: We’ll see.

When I originally said “we’ll see” it was with an air of uncertainty about how well I can stick with this, given my track record of late. But one of the things that I have strived (is that a word?) to do all along is not allow myself to talk or write about my weight loss with any measure of negativity or uncertainty about my ability to succeed. Because I am succeeding and I will continue to do so. I’m choosing to give new meaning to my “we’ll see” comment and have decided that it means “we’ll see just how successful I can be, because my time to shine is all the time.”

Also – I am going to start posting every day again, even if it is just to say what I ate. If you don’t see a post from me I give you all full permission to take that as a sign that I was naughty and don’t want to fess up to it. BUT I don’t plan on that happening so no worries! I'll also be posting my weekly weigh in every Monday - gotta have added motivation to stay on track over the weekend!


*Lori's Natural Foods is the source of the tasty but not healthy wraps that I was addicted to. But not any more! Well, they will still have them but I no longer feel drawn to them like in the cartoons when a certain scent wafts around and entrances bugs bunny into floating over to whatever it might be.

crazy week

This week has been all over the place.

Monday I had a good breakfast and then tried the new stuff I made this weekend for lunch - not really awesome - and then I got the worst headache. And this was the day where it was gray and dreary outside so I just felt sleepy and lethargic in general... but anyway, I figured the headache was detox from not eating well over the weekend and that I could deal with it and I would feel better when I got to eat dinner. I went home and had my salad with beans on it for dinner along with pita bread and *ahem* pizza crusts, and the result was horrible headache getting worse compounded by nausea. Good times. Monday ended with a trip to worship the porcelain goddess and passing out at 9:30.

Tuesday I woke up and still didn't feel well and decided to stay home. I had a great smoothie for breakfast (at 11am) and felt good enough to work out. I wasn't hungry for lunch but had a nice ETL dinner and felt a lot better by the day's end.

Wednesday I got up and worked out and then I got to work and the thought of food was repulsive. I didn't drink my smoothie or eat my soup for lunch. It was the strangest thing - I wasn't hungy at all and didn't feel hungry or sick or anything. After work I went to the grocery store because I was out of lettuce and ended up getting whole grain Goldfish crackers too - and then proceeded to have them for dinner. And then later I had 2 veggie hot dogs and a couple of fries... I had been craving veggie hot dogs for a while and I was also craving ketchup for some reason. Strange. What sucks the most is that I didn't even really want the Goldfish crackers and was looking forward to my salad for dinner and while I was at the store I thought I should put them back but I didn't. If only I had a time machine.

Today I had my smoothie and soup for lunch but I also had a peice of grape pie as dessert. I will have salad with "refried" beans for dinner and am looking forward to it.

My physical and emotional feelings have been all over the place this week and it hasn't been fun. I know that if I were eating more consistently then I would feel better but then I get so frustrated that it is such a struggle for me to eat right. Sometimes I wish that hubby would ETL with me - even if it was just when he's at home. It would be comforting and fortifying to have someone in it with you.

I am getting frustrated and fed up with myself and I am starting to feel more motivated to stick with it a lot more closely. I am really sick of being stuck where I am and need the positive reinforcement of seeing the scale move. I will make it stick this time.

will it ever end?

I don't mind snow in December or January; and I can even deal with a snowy and cold Valentine's day. But so far; we haven't had ANY decent days in April - and it's depressing! Where is spring!?!

I'm glad that I have my home "gym" and have had some pretty good workouts in the past couple of days :-) I also made Curried Cashew Vegetable Soup this weekend (pics forthcoming) which has a nice, light, springtime taste - maybe if I start cooking wintery food the weather will get better?

tsk tsk tsk

Thursday:
Breakfast: standard smoothie (spinach, kale, blueberries, strawberries, 1/2 banana, flax and water)
Lunch: none
Exercise: Planned to be - 30 min Yourself!Fitness, 30 min treadmill
Dinner: Planned to be - romaine with hummus, 1/2 homemade pita; "raw brownies"
Fuhrmometer: 9 - Broccoli (if I stick with planned exercise and dinner)

I feel guilty about last night's dinner.

Although I had a decent week last week (didn't really feel like it but that's what the scale said). I'm pretty much the same today as I was last Thursday. It's SO frustrating! At the moment all I want to do is go to the HFS and pick up a really not good for me wrap and go home and NOT work out. I'm not going to do those things but it's how I feel at the moment.

I didn't eat lunch today. I wasn't hungry for it and figured I don't need the calories. I can't really decide if I chose to skip lunch truly because I wasn't hungry or if it was really because I subconsciously wanted to make-up for eating a bad dinner.

Furthermore - I can't figure out how bad I should feel about not eating the right foods. I'm torn between saying that I should just let the past be the past and work on being as good as I can right NOW and allowing myself to feel bad/guilty to reinforce the association that junk food is not worthwhile and condition myself not to want it. I suppose I'm leaning towards letting a guilty conscience make me feel bad as punishment - aren't we all our own biggest critics?

Sorry for the blah post... but I just had to get it out! Right now I'd give anything to get that motivation and resolve back that I had last summer; but I am starting to feel the same way I was - desperate to make some changes - so I'm taking that as a good sign. All I can do is do better!

so far so good

Tuesday:
Exercise: 30 min Yourself!Fitness, 30 min Treadmill
Breakfast: smoothie (spinach, kale, blueberries, strawberries, 1/2 banana, flax and water)
Lunch: Springtime Soup
Exercise: 30ish min walk with Cammie
Dinner: hummus on romaine, 1/2 homemade pita, applesauce with dates; cinnamon and lightly toasted walnuts
Fuhrmometer: 9.5 - Broccoli/Kale

Wednesday:
Exercise: 30 min Yourself!Fitness, 30 min Treadmill
Breakfast: smoothie (spinach, kale, blueberries, strawberries, 1/2 banana, flax and water)
Lunch: Springtime Soup
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie
Dinner: Chinese - tofu & broccoli in garlic sauce with white rice
Fuhrmometer: 7 - lentil

Well, so far I'm doing well with not taking that first bite. There has been temptation and I've almost given in a couple times but I'm happy to say that I've stayed strong. Yesterday when I got home from work & walking Cammie I really wanted a PB&J, but I didn't have it and am so happy that I didn't! For some reason I have this thing about eating at certain times, I usually have my breakfast smoothie around 10am and try not to eat lunch until at least 2, but sometimes this doesn't work and I get hungry earlier. The same happens with dinner. I get hungry at 6 but don't want to eat until later and then end up eating a snack and then dinner later. Well last night when I was hungry for dinner at 5:45 I made myself wait until 6 and then had dinner. I think that some part of me is worried that I'll get hungry again if I eat dinner too early, but I was fine. I also need to remember that getting hungry is not the end of the world; I'm not going to die if I get hungry at 5:30 and can't eat until 7:30. It's just food!

Speaking of food; yesterday I was craving cinnamon rolls for some reason (I think it must have been the kind of coffee they made at the office) and came up with a really great and ETL-friendly "dessert" to satisfy my craving for brown sugar and cinannamon: dates pureed with a little hot water and cinnamon mixed into warm applesauce and topped with lightly toasted walnuts. Yummy!

Today I have been staring down the leftover Easter candy and some crackers from an open house in the kitchen. A couple of times the little devil on my shoulder tried to get me to eat just one Hershey's Kiss or jelly bean and then another time the little devil almost convinced me to say "screw it" and eat all the jelly beans etc. But every time he tries I tell that little devil to go away and that I'm NOT going to take that first bite, and it feels really good to be in control.

Hi to hubby - I miss you and can't wait to hang out with you tonight! (Sunday, Monday and Tuesday's hubby and I don't really see one another because of work schedules)

avoiding doom

Unfortunately; we can't live in a world devoid of temptation. I think that things would be a lot easier if we could. But before I digress and begin philosophizing about morals and the like; I'll refine my original statement.

It's too bad that we can't live in a world where all food is good, healthy, nutritionally excellent food.

I am a big supporter of people deciding what they want to eat on their own. I wouldn't appreciate someone telling me that I should eat meat and animal products and likewise I don't push people to Eat to Live. Sure life would be easier if the people around me ate more like I do; but that's also a two-way street. The point is, I've made a decision to eat as naturally and nutritiously as possible and I have to learn to live with the fact that there is food around me that I shouldn't eat and condition myself not to want to eat it.

There are times when I'll give in and eat something that I shouldn't and afterward I can just feel that the food was basically a hollow nutritional wasteland. There are times when I've given in and had that first bite of something and instantly regretted it. There are times when that first bite triggers a landslide of bad eating and the "screw it" mentality.

Yesterday I had one of those days where the first bite led to my downfall. I didn't eat too horribly but I know I could have had a much better day if I didn't have that first bite. I know that eating off-plan food will make me feel guilty and regretful and not help my weight loss at all and I have to keep remembering that every time I pass the candy dish in the hallway at work, or every time I walk into the office kitchen and see sweets and crackers and whatever staring back at me.

Recently, over at at Half of Me (a FANTASTIC weight-loss blog); PQ wrote about how smokers can quit smoking completely and alcoholics avoid alcohol completely but everyone always has to eat - no matter if one is addicted to food or not (go read the post). I am often in a state of mind these days where I wish that I didn't enjoy or care about food and truly just ate to satisfy my biological nutritional needs. I often wish that I don't want to eat for stress relief or enjoyment or any of that horrible stuff but I do - and it's much more mental than physical - it's the enjoyment of sitting down to eat dinner with hubby and sharing a meal (the same food) once in a while and that feeling of "normal." This is a big thing that I'll need to work on.

For now, I'm going to work on NOT taking that first bite and remembering the doom that will follow from taking that first bite before it happens. I'll have so many more good, no, AWESOME days if I can pull this off. It wasn't easy when I first went vegetarian almost 10 years ago; but over time my resolve not to eat meat has grown and strengthened, and a big factor in that was not breaking down and eating that chicken sandwich or whatever it was that tempted me. That resolve paid off and here I am, these days I wouldn't eat a steak if you paid me. I think that with time, persistence, and NOT taking that first bite I'll be able to do the same with ETL.


PS The image is of the top of our wedding cake, our 1.5 year anniversary/ 2 year homeowning anniversary is this Saturday. Hard to believe! ;-)

Even though it's been snowing (YUCK!) here and I haven't felt too good for the past few days; I made a lot of spring-timey food for the upcoming week. I made Dr. Fuhrman's Tasty Hummus, Whole Wheat Pitas, and Springtime Soup.

The most fun thing that we made (hubby helped) were the pitas. They were also surprisingly easy to make. I got this recipe at AllRecipes and used King Arthur White Whole Wheat flour instead of white flour to keep it whole grain. We also used applesauce instead of oil to make it fat-free. Next time I make these I will cut the salt in half or eliminate it completely. I'll also will experiment with cutting down on the sugar - although I don't think that I can cut it out completely because the yeast needs a little sugar, doesn't it? I also want to experiment with mixing in other types of flour or adding in flax.

But most importantly, the tastiest thing that I made this weekend is the soup. Hubby got Nava Atlas' Vegetarian Soups for All Seasons: Bountiful Vegan Soups and Stews for Every Time of Year for me back at Christmas time and I haven't had a chance to cook anything out of it until now. The soup I made today I adapted from her recipe for Greek-Flavored Spinach and Orzo Soup. I doubled the recipe since soup is an entire meal for me and cut out the oil. I substituted pearl barley for the orzo because I'd rather have a whole grains than the pasta, used (a lot) more spinach than called for in the original recipe and added artichokes. Here's the recipe as I made it:

Springtime Soup

Adapted from Greek-Flavored Spinach and Orzo Soup by Nava Atlas

2 C cleaned & sliced leek
6-10 cloves garlic, minced
1 large red bell pepper, diced
12 cups water with 4 cubes salt-free vegan bouillon (or equal amount of light flavored veggie broth)
2 cans salt-free tomatoes, briefly buzzed in blender or food processor
2 9oz boxes frozen artichokes
1 cup pearl barley
2 tsp dill
2 1-lb bags frozen spinach
1 small bunch flat-leaf parsley, coarsely chopped
1 C lemon juice

1. Water-sauté leeks, garlic, and red bell pepper until softened; about 5 minutes.
2. Add water, bouillon, tomatoes, barley, dill, and frozen artichokes. Cover and bring to simmer for 30-40 minutes until barley is slightly chewy.
3. When soup is almost done simmering, portion spinach out into containers. (Do this only if making meals ahead, if not stir spinach into soup before serving).
4. Stir in parsley and lemon juice.

Yield: 8 to 10 meal-sized servings

It may have been the scale; but when I weighed myself on Friday morening after having an awesome day on Thursday I was down about 5 pounds. My first thought was that the batteries in the scale are dying and we need to get some new ones pronto. But I weighed myself a few more times and figured that it was pretty close to reality. I must have shed a lot of water weight that day.

Friday, Saturday and Sunday were struggles - on Friday I didn't plan well and ended up having junk food for lunch and then said "screw it" and had junk for dinner too. Saturday and Sunday are a blur... Then Monday I got my act together and worked out and ate well most of the day. I didn't do too well for dinner but it wasn't horrible either and I luckily had a loss when I weighed myself yesterday morning. Tuesday was another roller coaster type of day; and I did OK but not great. I did end up losing some due to my food for the day being mostly ETL-friendly (but too much pasta and I did have some dairy).

I have been feeling really bad about not being able to get back on plan as strictly as I want to. Then I realized that in the last week the scale has gone down almost 10 pounds (we'll see what it says tomorrow morning). Which, even if a lot of that is water weight, isn't too bad. Actually, it's pretty good and I kind of feel guilty about it!

I know I can do better and these numbers should spur me on to see what I really can do when I actually TRY TO RESTRAIN MYSELF. I can remember in the beginning last summer when I had cravings that I thought were going to drive me crazy but I just let them be and didn't give into them. I asked myself why at the beginning I had so much more resolve and willpower not to cheat, what was different about me then? The answer that I came up with is that last summer I was nearly 300 pounds and I had so much self loathing about it that I had to get the weight off as quickly as possible so I wouldn't feel as much shame as I was feeling about my weight. Now that I've lost 70-75 pounds I don't feel as bad about my body as I did. This is dangerous. I'm closer to my goals of being "normal sized" and being able to wear normal clothes (a shallow motivator I know, but still it's a big one for me). So I need to keep going.

I need to keep going.

I want to keep going.

I will keep going.

I want to feel even better and be able to do even more. I want to continue to get healthier. And I do want to eventually buy these beautiful goal dresses that I keep on looking at and pining over all of the time. I just need to put more coal on the ol' motivational fire.

the do-over: Day 1

Thursday:
Exercise: 30 min Yourself!Fitness, 30 min Treadmill
Breakfast: Smoothie (7oz spinach, 3oz kale, 1/2 banana, strawberries, blueberries, 2 dates, flax and water)
Lunch: Blended Greens Soup (with lentils)
Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie
Dinner: Blended Salad (romaine, pineapple, strawberries, 2 dates), 1 oz Walnuts (not in the smoothie)

Fuhrmometer: KALE!

Today was easier than I thought it would be. I am having some detox symptoms, a small headache and achy body in general and I felt like I could go to bed at 6:30, but no major cravings or anything. Part of today going so well had to do with having a positive attitude about things and the other big factor for today's success was all of the greens I packed into my smoothie - 10oz! That's twice what I have been putting into them and I also cut back on the banana. It tastes mostly the same but is a little less sweet. Overall it's still tasty and awesomely good for me. Oh yeah, it was SALT FREE too! Go me!

And see that picture up there? Yeah, it's the Deueling Dragons Roller Coaster at Universal Studios Islands of Adventure and I rode it when we were in Florida last week. We also rode The Mummy, The Hulk, and the Flying Unicorn roller coasters - but the dragons were my favorite. Ok, the Mummy was pretty cool too (we got my 87 year-old grandpa to ride it, hilarious!).

But this isn't a roller-coaster blog! It's a weight-loss and sometimes food blog and the reason that I mention the roller coasters is that last month I wrote about how I hoped that I would fit into the roller coaster seats; and that I have been avoiding roller coasters and theme parks in general for years because I knew I didn't fit in the seats. Well now I'm less overweight that I have been in probably about 10 years and I was ready to give roller coasters a try again.

At Universal they have what I'm calling test seats out in front of the roller-coastery attractions with a sign that says something like "This attraction cannot accommodate people with certain body types, please use these test seats to see if you fit." Or something like that. Anyway, these test seats are in front of the entrance to the attraction where everyone is - so if you don't fit it'd still be pretty embarassing.

The first ride like this that we (I) wanted to go on was The Mummy - and if you haven't been on it and are planning to go to Universal - YOU HAVE TO RIDE IT! When we were walking up to it we saw the seats and hubby said "do you want to try it out?" I did, but I didn't want to take the risk of not fitting in front of all of those other people and kids. I took a look at the seats, "Nah, I'll be ok" I said.

So we went in, and the whole wait to get on the ride I was dieing of nervousness, it did't get any better and even as we were sliding through the car to our seats I was wondering if I would fit... I mentally crossed my fingers and sat down... I FIT! It was such an awesome feeling and I'm glad that we went to the park.

Other people have said it before and it is so true - don't wait to live your life until you reach your goal, you'll miss out on a lot of fun along the way.

last hurrah's and new beginnings

It’s probably a vast generalization on my part to say this; but most dieters engage in a last hurrah before embarking on their diet plan. They will allow themselves one final last goodbye to all of the food that they will no longer be able to eat once they start to actually control their eating. One last meal of not caring about calories, fat, or nutritional value, not worrying about willpower, and just having whatever they want. Or maybe it’s just me.

Tomorrow morning I am starting the Six-Week Plan again. I dislike having to say that I am starting over; because to me I never really felt like I stopped Eating to Live. For the most part I’ve been good with at least having my breakfast smoothies and a good lunch or dinner. But the fact of the matter is that ever since the holidays I haven’t been doing my best. There have been a few weeks here and there where I was doing "ok" but it didn’t last; and knowing that I am not eating as well as I possibly can is weighing on my conscience.

In April and May I will have to attend an Alumni event and Graduation for students who attend the college where I work. I’d like to look nice for these events. When hubby and I were on vacation I tried on a very pretty dress in a size 16. This is a big deal because currently most of my pants that fit well are 20’s or 20W’s. So when the size 16 (not 16W I might add) actually fit onto my body, albeit snugly, it felt really good. I’d like to be able to go back to the store and buy that dress or one like it so I can look and feel good for these festive occasions.

So starting tomorrow it’ll be a fresh start. I’m prepared for the cravings, I’m prepared for the headaches, I’m prepared to feel junky in general; but I’m also prepared to get my tastebuds back when I kick my salt habit and I’m also prepared to not have any more cravings and to just feel altogether awesome. Last summer I lost 25 pounds in my first five weeks. I have five weeks from Friday to the Alumni Event and eight weeks from Friday to Graduation– let’s see how good I can do!

The Phasing Out of Salt: Day One

Thursday:
Breakfast: Standard Smoothie
Lunch: Green Soup (greens & lentils, garlic, tomatoes etc.)
Dinner: grilled cheese (CRINGE!)

Well day one of the de-salting of Nicole went ok. I should have had salad for dinner but just didn't. It's lunches (soup) that are the real issue for me with salt. Breakfast smoothies or blended salads aren't a challenge with salt and I can be happy with salad without salt as well (and usually am). It seems to be hot foods and beans that I find myself wanting to add salt to. I usually make my soups without salt and use no-salt canned tomatoes and all - but then I end up adding Bragg's to the soup before eating it. I'd like to think that it is lower-sodium overall to add the Bragg's but even some added salt/sodium is more than I need.

Dr. Fuhrman has referenced studies that have shown that people who eat a Vegetarian diet without regard to salt intake have a risk of stroke that is higher than those who eat the Standard American Diet (i.e. junk). Furthermore, effects of salt consumption can manifest in high blood pressure later in life. I recently checked my blood pressure in one of those pharmacy blood pressure machines and it was something close to 130/80, which is higher than the "normal" 120/80 - it's not too much higher but I know that I can bring it down by continuing to exercise and cutting out the added sodium in my diet. Salt is addictive and dangerous to my health and I don't want to be dependent on it or put myself at risk for hypertension or stroke any longer.

I'd really like to retrain my tastebuds so that I'm not addicted to salt for soups and other hot foods to taste good. Fellow ETLers who have cut out salt have said that after a while food no longer tastes bland and the flavor returns and things taste even better than they did before. I tried to cut out salt last summer when I first started Eat to Live and was miserable. I decided that it would be ok to use Braggs in my food because it is lower sodium than table salt and I could easily stick to keeping the added salt to around 300mg a day.

Now that I'm in a place where I'm comfortable with the diet and working out I am ready to kick the salt addiction. In the last 9.5 months I've made a lot of improvements to my diet by working to eat for nutritional excellence. It's another step toward becoming the healthy, athletic person that I am striving to be.

Sorry it's been so long! I've been doing ok the past few days; nothing fantastic but not too horrible either. Work has been very busy with my boss on vacation and me trying to get ready for vacation. I spent Sunday making soup and smoothie kits to last me this week and next week AND the week after that. It'll be nice to come back from vacation and not worry about breakfasts or lunches. Dinners will be salad so they're always easy.

I hope to be able to swim for exercise in Florida. I guess that will depend on how cold the pool is and if I can tolerate it!

When I get home I would like to finally cut salt out of my diet. I know how bad it is for me and I'd really like to "get my taste buds back" as many other ETLers have. Tune in at the end of next week for my de-salting journey!

blah blah, whine, complain, go eat some spinach

Today I woke up on the wrong side of the bed. I didn't want to work out; and procrastinated about it for a good 45 minutes befire going downstairs to do it. My workout wasn't much fun either. I spent a lot of the time saying mean things to Maya - the virtual personal trainer in Yourself!Fitness- and after 30 minutes of that I gave up rather than doing my regular other 30 minutes of exercise. Then I was crabby about going to work - it's especially tough when it's hubby's day off and I still have two more days of work. I was angry that I didn't "have anything to wear". When I got to work I was b*!chy about being here and didn't want to talk to anyone and I was literally angry at the junk food in the kitchen.

But then I had my smoothie - 8oz spinach, 4oz each blueberries, strawberries and banana with flax and water. And got some work done and now I don't feel so grumpy. I actually feel pretty ok. I don't know for sure if the attitude change is due to the good, healthy food but I think it helped. I know that when I'm eating right I feel better emotionally/psychologically as well as physically. Compared to how I used to feel emotionally/physically before ETL it's a very big improvement and is something that I'd sort of forgotten about. I'm kind of in a round-about way glad for this because it did remind me of another reason why I love this lifestyle.

The picture doesn't show too much of a difference from the -50 picture but I can tell a big difference in my clothes and the physical activity I can do. :-)

Hopefully sometime this week or next week before we leave for vacation I'll hit the 80 pounds lost mark which will be halfway to my goal!

FINALLY!

I've lost 75 pounds!

It took almost six months to lose this last 25 pounds; but I did it - and I learned a lot about myself in that six months too. 5 more pounds and I'll be 1/2 way there!

More tonight - just wanted to start celebrating early ;-)

edited at 4:21

Saturday:
Exercise: 30 min Yourself!Fitness, 30 min Treadmill
Breakfast: Standard Smoothie
Lunch/Dinner: steamed veggies, rice, veggie egg roll

Well last night I had a great two-hour workout burning 1000 calories of bad food that I ate yesterday. This morning I got up had had another decent workout today; so I feel like I'm pretty much recovered from yesterday's indescretions.

Today we were out shopping and went to a chinese place for lunch. I had the steamed veggies with just a little bit of white rice and dipped my fork in the sauce on the side for a little flavor. I did also have a veggie egg roll; which isn't so good, but I'm happy about everything else.

falling down

Friday (so far):
Breakfast: orange juice, winter warm fruit salad, pound cake, whipped cream, 3 mini- bite sized quiches
Lunch: winter warm fruit salad, pound cake, whipped cream, chex mix

I shoulda had a smoothie!

Today was a co-worker's birthday; and we had a brunch for her. I made Dr. Fuhrman's Winter Warm Fruit Salad to bring in with fresh whipped cream and pound cake. My plan was to just have the fruit but somehow I allowed myself to have the cake and all of that other junk. And then I did it again for lunch... what's wrong with me? Why did I do that? I feel so crappy about it and am really angry with myself right now. I wish I had had a smoothie for breakfast to make it easier to resist the bad food, I wish I had stopped myself before I ate any of that crap... I was doing so well.

Today was supposed to be my day off from working out but now I think that I need to go home and work as much of this off as I can. Hubby is working OT tonight so I guess I will spend my Friday night on the treadmill atoning for my SAD sins. It'll make me feel better and hopefully I won't end up gaining weight because of my indescretions.

Well, back on the horse with the knowledge and experience never to come to work (or anywhere) on a party day without my smoothie!

Thursday:
Exercise: 30 min Yourself!Fitness, 30 min Treadmill
Breakfast: Standard Smoothie
Lunch: 2/3 bowl Golden Austrian Cauliflower soup, apple
Dinner: whole wheat pita, romaine, red onion, refried beans
Fuhrmometer: Kale

Today was a good day. I wasn't tempted to eat bad food at all today and am feeling really good about things. I guess that's just about it for today!