The other day Kim asked this question:

"I was wondering if you had tried any of the recipes from the E2L book that weren't soup oriented... I sometimes wonder how filling soup alone can be. Is there a reason why you tend towards a very "liquidy" E2L? Just curious. :)"

I went to post a comment to answer; but I ended up writing a book and thought it would make a half-way decent post, so here goes:

Two recipes that I have tried that aren't soups are the Mexican Lasagna/Enchilada Casserole and an Eggplant Lasagna (using eggplant instead of noodles) from Fat Free Vegan. They were both very good and I would make them again. Other non-soup dishes I have made are steamed veggies with some seasonings and a little bit of Braggs and also wraps with hummus and other veggies.

I realize that I usually make soups and haven’t tried too many non-soup dishes; I have found that I really like soup and it can be very filling. I like to make soups which include beans to get in my daily allotment of beans and make the soup more filling than it would be without the beans. Since I try my best to stay away from grains and starchy veggies soups are a good and easy way for me to get these things in.

Another reason that I have gravitated toward a "liquidy" ETL diet it for ease and simplicity. I'm not a morning person, so putting all of my frozen fruit and banana together on the weekends and making a quick smoothie to take to work with me on weekdays works very well. For me, soup is also easy to make ahead and freeze in individual containers to take to work for lunch. Since I’m the only person in my household who is ETLing, it’s more convenient for me to make one thing on the weekend and eat it throughout the week rather than cooking something every night.

In my early ETLing days I did try to eat all my food whole – whole fruits and big salads and huge bowls of steamed veggies. Over time I evolved into a system that I am very happy with (when temptation doesn’t get the better of me). I prefer to eat a “liquidy” ETL because it’s what works for me. The food still retains all of its nutrients and fiber but is just easier to ingest. I prefer not to take an hour and a half to eat breakfast – but that’s just me. I think that everyone has to figure out how to make the plan work for them. I’m in a place right now where I am very happy with the formula I’ve come up with but it took a while to get here.

I’ve never felt that I have the patience or time to cook a different meal every night… I guess that’s part of the reason that I used to have a vegetarian diet made up of a lot of frozen food and take out. Not healthy! Now I have a much healthier diet that is for the most part just as simple as it was before.

In other news - still trying to get back on track - it's tough but I am getting back into the right mindset. I had a few good days this week and a few not-so-good days too. I've made some good decisions and some not so good. Each day I am trying my best and each day will get better and better.

Been doing ok with this new resolution...

Monday:
Breakfast: smoothie (spinach, blueberries, banana, strawberries and flax)
Lunch: Blended Green Soup
Dinner: Salad (lettuce, red onion, balsamic vinegar, walnuts, a little bit of blue cheese) and then some of hubby's hot chocolate and some cereal with soy milk

Exercise: None
Fuhrmometer: Lentil


Tuesday:
Breakfast: smoothie
Lunch: Blended Green Soup and a small handful of popcorn
Pre-workout: small spoon of peanut butter
Dinner: Salad (same as before) and *cringe* ice cream bar

Exercise: 65 min Yourself!Fitness
Fhurmometer: Lentil/Eggplant

cracking down

I don’t really like to admit it; but I am a competitive person. This usually doesn’t come out in the traditional sense, like when playing games or racing or something… for me, it’s about intelligence and success. Where does this tie into weight loss? Well, I guess I am a competitive dieter.

I’ve been struggling to have consistent weight loss for a few months now. I lost my first 50 pounds in just over 3 months. It’s been over 4 months since then and I’ve only managed to get another 20 pounds off. The only reason for this is that I haven’t been strict enough with what I eat. I allowed myself to eat whatever I wanted throughout the holidays and then the kitchen remodel. For the past few weeks since we’ve been able to use the kitchen again I’ve been doing better but not great. When it gets to be the weekend it’s been all too easy to just eat bad food and let the “screw it” mentality take over. To add insult to injury I haven’t been working out consistently either.

There are many weight loss blogs that I love to read; not only to learn about the experiences and thoughts of others as they lose weight and learn about their relationship with food but also as a measure of how I am doing compared to others. It’s a stupid thing to do but it does keep me going. I’ve been stalled for nearly two months now and am jealous of the rest of the world who made it through the holidays with losses or successfully got back on track weeks ago. I’m sick of myself and my lack of willpower and discipline. I’m pissed at myself that I’ve let myself lag behind in this self-imposed race.

I want to lose another 50 like the first 50. I want to break out of the 200’s more than anything. I want to have the discipline back that I had in the beginning. I need to crack down on myself.

This all seems like a major contradiction to my last post doesn’t it? I think on the surface it can appear that way; but at the same time – caring more about nutrition now than before and wanting to get the scale moving again can be two very separate things. I have been too laid back about things for the past few weeks and I need to get back to work.

My newest goal – six weeks of nothing but ETL – no ice cream, no chips, no pizza and no wraps from the HFS. My only non-ETL exception? Salad from a restaurant and a little bit of blue cheese on my dinner salads. I know I can do it. Also – I will back to posting daily what I eat and my workouts. Starting NOW!

the inner dialogue

A few weeks ago; I decided to try out bringing my soup with me to have for lunch instead of having it for dinner. I had been bringing salad or a blended salad for lunch since I started ETLing last June and it works out better some days than others. I thought that if I have warm and filling soup for lunch it will help me not make excuses to go get lunch from the Natural Foods store or eat the random junk food that sometimes finds its way into the office kitchen.

So the plan has been working well and today I had a breakthrough. I've talked before about the delicious but not necessarily healthy wraps at the Natural Foods store which is coincidentally right down the street from my office. In the past I have had trouble staying away from these wraps. I get the idea of them in my head and sometimes its hard for me to say no and eat my planned lunch. The thought of them just tortures me until I give in and go get one. Sometimes I feel guilty about it; sometimes I feel icky after eating it; and sometimes I enjoy it. But I always know that I'm not eating as healthy as I should.

Here's the part about the breakthrough. Today I brought some of my blended greens and lentil soup (two posts down) with me for lunch but I thought in the back of my head that maybe I would get a wrap for lunch and save the soup for another day. Usually this is the point where I can't get the thought of the wrap out of my head and have to go get it to stop torturing myself; but today the inner me said "No, I really want to have delicious and nutritious green soup for lunch." instead of going on and on about the wrap. BREAKTHROUGH! The soup for lunch technique works!

I think that I am *finally* getting to a point in my ETLing where I am out of the diet mentality and am more focused on just eating good healthy food. I am more concerned with making sure that I get in as much raw and leafy greens into all my meals rather than how many pounds I am going to lose this week or when I will hit my target weight. It took 7 months to get to this point; and for a long time I didn't think that I would. Now I can really say that Eat to Live is a lifestyle for me and not a diet tool. Once I do reach my goal weight I will surely keep this up for life. It feels so good to be able to say that and really truely believe it.

Picture Pages: Kitchen

DISCLAIMER: The pics aren't formatted correctly right now but I will update with better ones. I just had to post some pics!


As much of a before as I have... note the hole in the sophet (sp?) and the already peeled wallpaper amongst other destruction :-)

Before - left. Yes, I did pick out the ORANGE orange paint and no, I don't know why.

Before - right. We have a small and narrow kitchen so I have to stand in the dining room to take the pictures.

View into the kitchen from the dining room through the old (narrow!) doorway and the useless little window thingie. We got rid of the window and widened up the doorway.

My Grandpa (he's 87 and still helping with the construction proejcts) with the cabinet-less kitchen.

Just the studs.

Another view of the gutted kitchen.

Back to looking like a "real" room again!

Finally I get to paint!

Cabinets back in, new countertop in, pot rack is up... VitaMix back in it's rightful place. It's gonna be so nice!

We still have to tile the floor and backsplash and finish the cabinets. It took us a while to decide how we want to finish them but we've finally made up our minds. More pictures as things get wrapped up!

Recipe!

We are STILL remodeling the kitchen! Right now we do have use of the sink and stove and I have some counter space so I have been back on ETL as of the beginning of this week. With the holidays and a week of eating nothing but fast food and cereal, I gained more than I'd care to say. The good news is that since Sunday I have lost half of what I gained and am feeling SO much better now that I am eating REAL food again :-)

Here is the recipe for an easy soup that I made. I needed something that had minimal prep and could be cooked in one pot. It also had to include veggies and beans and I really wanted to make something with Kale and a lot of other super-nutritious greens in it. Here's what I came up with; it's actually a lot better than I was expecting - although I think it needs more garlic!
Nicole's Green Soup
Yield: 6 (generous) servings

4 c Veggie Broth + 2 to 4 c water
1 head of garlic, cloves crushed
1 lb green lentils
1 bunch kale, rinsed and thick stems cut off
1 bunch collards, rinsed and thick stems cut off
1 bunch bok choy, rinsed and broken/torn into pieces
Some frozen spinach
1 14.5 oz can no-salt canned tomatoes

1. Heat veggie broth and water in soup pot while cleaning and trimming all of the greens and crushing all of the garlic.
2. Put the garlic and the lentils in the pot and bring to a boil, add the greens to the top to steam.
3. Simmer until lentils are tender and greens are soft.
4. Blend in batches, add diced tomatoes to a batch or stir them in at the end to leave them chunky.

I like to add some Bragg's Liquid Aminos to this at meal time; it adds a nice dimension to the soup.

More soon; especially pictures of the kitchen!

Under Construction

Happy New Year everyone!

I am not quitting blogging or Eat to Live - but I have been on hiatus from both due to the holidays and a complete remodel of our kitchen (that we are doing ourselves with some help from my parents and Grandpa). We ripped everything out and are in the process of putting things back in. Right now we have new lighting installed and the wiring and drywall are in. Our refrigerator is the only appliance that is still running (and it has been doing so in the dining room). I plan to get right back into things as soon as I can use the new kitchen - and I really can't wait! I was laying in bed last night wishing that I could wake up and make a smoothie to bring to work with me this morning; I really miss them and my blended salads. I hope that we will have a useable kitchen by the end of the upcoming weekend. We've been taking pictures - I'll post them sometime soon.

My New Year's Resolution is to be more positive and not let the negativity of others (this is mostly at work) bother me as much. Do you have a New Year's Resolution? What is it?

ETL Angels

A BIG thank you to everyone who left me a comment from yesterday's post, your encouragement means so much to me and I am so very very lucky to have readers like all of you!


Here is how today went:
Breakfast: smoothie
Lunch: Italian-ish Stew, 2 small Christmas cookies
Dinner: Blended Salad

Exercise: 30 minute walk with Cammie, 30 min treadmill, 30 min Yourself!Fitness

Fuhrmometer: Broccoli

I'm giving myself Broccoli today because I did have the cookies at lunch but later I threw the rest of the cookies out instead of having one. I had a stressed out moment and was going to have a big cookie but I didn't; I just tossed them --hopefully no one at work was upset about it!

I'm trying something a little different with my meals this week, instead of having my salad or blended salad for lunch I'm talking my hot meal. I think that it will help me not want to go out and get lunch and it also cuts down on my am food prep time. So far it's working out well; I haven't thought about not eating the food I've brought with me :-)

Last night and tonight I was tempted not to eat a real dinner and out of laziness have cashews instead of my blended salad. Then something amazing happened; my little ETL angel appeared on my shoulder and said "But think about all of the nutrients you'll miss!" AND I AGREED!!! I am so happy that I thought about nutrition rather than ease or time or anything else. I feel like it was a great breakthrough for me.

Cammie likes my blended salads too - I think this is really funny. She's such an awesome pup.

lately...

...I haven’t been very consistent with posting. I’ve been considering not blogging anymore and just continuing on without writing about things. Ultimately I’ve decided that I do want to continue blogging and that I need to get back to blogging daily. I think that writing about my food and exercise and other experiences daily will help keep my head in the game. It won’t always be interesting; but it’s what I need to do.
Last week was not a good week. It wasn’t good at work and it wasn’t good on the ETL front either. There were two work Christmas parties, one at which I ate whatever I wanted and the other at which I didn’t eat anything. Plus all the other stresses coerced me into eating not good food. I kept on trying to eat better but it just never happened. I didn’t even bother to weigh myself on Sunday morning because I just don’t want to know. I am going to be much much better this week, I finally realized yesterday that one of the reasons that I’ve been feeling crappy lately is that I have been eating junk. I know that I feel so much better physically and psychologically when I am eating well that it really is a good incentive not to eat junk food.

Something that all of this recent stress has made me think about a lot is why I eat and why I’m overweight. I wish I were a person who is programmed to eat when hungry and not think about food when I’m not hungry; but I’m not. I think about food entirely too much and when I’m not mindful of it I will eat when I’m bored or if something sounds good or if I’m lonely or if I’m stressed. I talk myself into eating bad food all too easily and it’s all to easy to eat too much. In the past I used to sneak food – I can remember sneaking downstairs at night after everyone else in the house was asleep and making food. Now when I think about doing this at least there is a voice inside me that says “Who are you hiding from? You’re the one that’s not going to lose weight by doing this.” Whether or not I always listen to that voice is another story… The thing is, I know that overtime I have developed these unhealthy food habits and that they need to be changed. Some people would say that they are a food addict because of these things – I don’t want to label myself as an addict and make the excuse that these impulses can’t be changed – I know they can and I will change them. Writing about it and admitting it (as tough as it is) helps.

One of the highlights (no really!) of last week was on Thursday when I took a half day at work to get out and enjoy the 55 degree weather (in Western New York, in the middle of December!) with Cammie. We took a walk in a park that’s kind of close to home… what an eventful walk! I had to pee in the woods (first time and hopefully last) and also ended up losing my car & house keys in the park. We ended up walking home and asking a neighbor to borrow her phone so I could call hubby who had to leave a friend in a lurch and fight rush-hour traffic to come home and let me in. Then hubby and I went back to the park (in the dark! I kept on thinking Blair Witch Project) to look for the keys (we had a flashlight). No, we didn’t find them but we did have a spare set. I think I walked for somewhere in the 7 to 8 mile range that day. The best part was when we got home Hubby asked Cammie if she wanted to go for a walk and she started wagging her tail – that doggie just LOVES to take walks!

attitude

I’m not sure how often I’ve said it here; but I say it to my students all the time. Attitude is one of the biggest factors of success. It sounds corny, but I truly believe it and have experienced it. When one approaches a task with a positive attitude the chance that he or she is going to successfully complete that task is towering over someone with a negative attitude.

When I was in college I had to take Calculus, it was a degree requirement. In high school I didn’t think I was a math person, and I let it get in the way of doing well in Math and Science and on those lovely lovely standardized tests, if only I could go back and approach high school with a positive attitude. But the point here isn’t about high school… it’s about college. So the first time I took Calculus I had a bad attitude and projected it onto the professor. I felt I couldn’t learn anything from him and ended up just stopping going to class. Needless to say I had an F in the class. Two years later I took the class again; this time with a positive approach. I told myself that I would do all of the homework and practice questions every day and would ask for help if there was something I didn’t understand. I had a positive approach to the class and the professor and had a much better experience. I ended up getting a B or B+ (I can’t remember which) in the class which is amazing for someone who didn’t think that she was a “math person.”

I’ve tried to lose weight before as well. I don’t think that I approached it with the right positive attitude. I was full of “I hope I lose weight” and “If I get this weight off.” There was doubt that I would be able to be successful, and it turned out to be a self-fulfilling prophecy. This go-round, I do not allow myself to say “I hope” it’s “I will” and so on. This time I know I am going to be successful and keep in mind that eating according to Eat to Live is the healthiest thing that I can do for my body, that the food does taste good, and that I enjoy exercising. I’m not just telling myself these things figuring that they will sink in eventually; I really do believe them.

This doesn’t mean that the road is not long and rough. I do feel disappointed when I end up caving to myself and eating food that I shouldn’t. Eating for comfort and stress relief is something that I do have to get a grip on, and will. Sometimes I do get feeling down about my progress, especially when I get into these places where I struggle to get the scale moving. Losing weight is tough, and I want to be as honest about my experience as possible. It’s not all good, but I do try to find the positive. I’m sorry if sometimes this doesn’t come through, I will be more vigilant about it in the future.

There are other factors aside from food that come into play. A lifetime of living as a fat girl doesn’t do much for one’s self-confidence and in my case has made me a shy and introverted person. I prefer being by myself or with hubby, my close family and very very good friends and am very uncomfortable with strangers or large crowds. I do feel much better about my appearance already and know that that feeling will continue to grow as I continue to lose weight. I think that feeling better about my appearance will allow me to increase self-confidence and help me to become a more outgoing person in the future – I just need to approach it with a positive attitude.

Thank you to the Anonymous commenter from Monday’s post for getting me thinking about all of this. If nothing else; I need to keep in mind that I am no longer a 300lb miserable and hopeless person and that I’ve got a lot to be excited about.

The image is one of my favorite paintings, it is “New York Movie" by Edward Hopper.

six months

Today:
Breakfast: smoothie
Lunch: wrap from HFS
Dinner: hummus on pita, blended salad

Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie

Fuhrmometer Reading: Lentil

No news to report regarding last week's weigh in. I stayed the same, which I suppose is ok for sort of going down hill at the end of the week. I missed my -75 by the six month mark, very disappointing. It has finally showed me that I have to stop setting goals like this for myself because despite my best efforts sometimes I just can't meet them. I am through with setting lose X amount by Y date goals and competing in challenges. The only goals and challenges I have anymore are to work as hard as I can to be as healthy as I can. I will lose the weight; but I will not impose a time limit on myself to do it in.

Today I was about to put the breaks on and say that I would just do my best for the next few weeks but not be so strict with myself. I was feeling so tired and burnt out about everything. I feel like I'm always running and I always have so much to do. This lifestyle takes a lot of time to prep the food and plan meals and exercise that I feel like I never get any time to just rest and veg out. My weekends are full and my weekdays are stressful. I just wanted some time to rest.

Then I looked at my pants. They look hideous... they are way too big and do not make me feel good at all. These same pants were so tight six months ago that I felt like a sausage stuffed into them. Not fun. And then I thought about the 4 pairs of pants from the Gap and the cute little herringbone pattern skirt that are hanging in my closet waiting for me to drop a few more pounds so I can wear them and I didn't want to coast anymore. I want to get back on the losing track. I want to be able to wear those clothes sooner than later!

I know it's kind of silly to be motivated by clothes but it helps me. Hubby and I were at the mall this weekend and it was nice to walk by the stores I used to shop in (like Lane Bryant) and say to hubby "I never have to shop there again!" It was also nice to be able to go to the mall and not feel as self-conscious as I would have before. Things have changed for the better by quite a bit and I've got to keep those things in mind.

this post is about food

Today:
Breakfast: Smoothie
Lunch: Blended Salad
Dinner: Spicy Red Lentil Soup, Cereal with Soy Milk

Exercise: rest day

Fuhrmometer Reading: Broccoli

Well I had a 5 Kale Day streak that I broke yesterday by having a wrap for lunch. I had been thinking about it for a few days and was having a rough day at work and just finally let myself have it. It was an emotional craving and I actually did start to feel better after I had it. The rest of the day was good; I didn't just chuck the rest of the day, which is something I've had a tendency to do in the past.

I read today on the Biggest Loser website that they think it's ok to have a cheat meal once a week so that one doesn't feel deprived and keeps up their motivation. The same article said that cheat meals help your body not to fall into a rut by eating around the same amount of calories all the time - it helps to keep you losing. I don't know if the claim about throwing a caloric curve ball at your body is based on any kind of scientific fact; but I really like the idea of allowing myself one cheat meal per week. Not a cheat DAY, not 4 trips to the buffet, just one cheat meal to keep me honest and keep my motivation going. I think it will help out my mental game. If it starts to effect me in other ways or on the scale we'll have to revisit this idea.

I'm feeling really creative in the kitchen lately and am itching to have some time to get in there and cook. Next week we are having our office Holiday party and I am bringing all ETL stuff. Here's what I plan on making: hummus, green velour dressing, and ETL Caesar Dressing to go with various veggies and whole wheat pita; so I stay away from the bad desserts I am going to make Date-Nut Truffles. More on the truffles when I make them. I also have some ideas for making an ETL mushroom stroganoff, which I'd really really like to make soon; because if it comes out the way I am imagining it, it's gonna be delicious.

Well I'm off to curl up with hubby and puppy and watch some TV. More later!

on being hungry

Today:
Breakfast: green smoothie (spinach, blueberries, strawberries, banana, flax and water)
Lunch: blended salad (romaine, baby carrots, pineapple, 1/2 banana)
Dinner: italian-ish stew

Exercise: 30 min Yourself!Fitness, 30 min

Fuhrmometer Reading: Kale

Today I've been thinking about hunger. One of the things you learn about first when discovering Eat to Live is the concept of toxic hunger; it makes sense to most people but you really don't realize the iron grip that hunger has over you until you've had relief from it. It's amazing to realize how much better life is when you're not dieing of hunger all the time or feeling headachy or tired or nautious from it.

Before I started ETLing I had such toxic hunger it wasn't funny. If I didn't eat sooner or later it would catch up with me and I'd get headaches or feel weak etc. I can remember a time where I was really hungry and hubby and I were out and about; it was going to be an hour or so until we were going to be home to eat and I was so hungry I got one of those horrible gum balls out of a vending machine to help curb the hunger. I remember hubby saying to me "you're so hungry you can't wait an hour for dinner?" and I really didn't think I could. The feeling of hunger felt unbearable at the time. Looking back, it makes me sad that I was such a slave to junk and it was effecting my body so much.

These days hunger is totally different. I still feel hungry but it's not uncomfortable or unbeararable. I don't get hungry headaches or feel any of those nasty effects of toxic hunger because I don't have to deal with it any more. I still have days where I feel like I am perpetually hungry now and then, but I don't have those "I MUST EAT NOW" moments. It really is so nice not to have to deal with the feelings of toxic hunger any more.

Another thing I love about eating a "diet" is the feeling of hunger. All too often when not being mindful about what I eat I end up eating just for the sake of eating or because I'm bored or whatever and miss out on the feeling of hunger. I felt like this over Thanksgiving - I would go to the fridge to grab some leftover something and think to myself that I'm not hungry, this isn't as satisfying when I'm not hungry. I really enjoy the feeling of being hungry and fulfilling the need. When you're not hungry, it's just not worth it.

It's great to be in touch with your body and know that you are giving it what it needs.

Thank goodness for the Holiday Challenge

Today:
Breakfast: smoothie
Lunch: blended salad (just pineapple, lettuce and carrots with water today)
Dinner: Italian-ish stew, dates & cashews

Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie, 30 min Yourself!Fitness, 36 min treadmill

Fuhrmometer: Kale


Well after a 4.4 pound loss this week I am back to my pre-Thanksgiving derailment of -71 pounds overall. Next week will be the six month mark for me and I'd really like to be at -75... nice "round numbers" make me happy.

And I know I can lose the 4 pounds this week. I've got a good streak going now of 3 Kale days in a row and it's actually pretty easy. I've got some good motivation and momentum right now so I know I can continue the streak on and on and on. Also having delicious food to eat helps too ;-)

catch-up & recipe

Ok sorry I've been MIA. It's been tough to find time to post these last few days.

Here's how things have been:
Thursday, a.k.a "Nose Dive"
B: standard smoothie
L: standard blended salad
D: pizza, apple pie

E: none
Fuhrmometer: Potato

Friday, a.k.a "return of the Kale"
B: standard smoothie
L: standard blended salad
D: spicy red lentil soup, pumpkin pie smoothie

E: short walk/sprint with Cammie between downpours, 30 min Yourself!Fitness, 30 min treadmill
Fuhrmometer: Kale

Saturday, a.k.a "yesterday"
B: standard smoothie
L: standard blended salad
D: italian-ish stew, pumpkin pie smoothie

E: 60 min walking Cammie (two 1/2hr walks), 30 min Yourself!Fitness, 30 min bike
Fuhrmometer: Kale


Italian-Ish Stew
(This makes a ton of soup/stew, 8 to 10 servings)

1.5 lb (dry) great northern or cannelini beans
2 cups diced carrots
2 cups diced celery
3 med white onions, diced
3 - 4 cloves garlic
2 15 oz cans no-salt diced tomatoes
1 small (2 oz?) can tomato paste
2 cups pearl barley
1 pkg Boca Italian Sausage
1 Tbl italian seasoning
1 Tbl basil
1 Tbl fennel seed
2 tsp rosemary
Water - a lot

1. Soak beans overnight, cook them until tender and portion out into 1 cup servings.

2. Partially defrost Boca Italian Sausage and then grind it up in the food processor until it is fine. Set aside.

3. Water-saute carrots, celery and onion in soup pot until they start to soften. Add in the tomatoes, garlic, and spices, simmer for 2 minutes.

4. Add barley and ground up Boca sausages and enough water to cover... I think I added *about* 10 cups and got a very thick stew-like consistency. Once water is added and soup is simmering, stir in tomato paste. Simmer soup until barley is tender but still chewy.

5. Portion soup out over the cooked beans into containers. Freezes very well.

The Boca Italian sausage is not really an ETL ingredient but when spread out over 8 to 10 servings is less than 300mg of sodium per serving (within ETL guidelines). It adds a great flavor to the soup!

I'm BACK, baby!

Today:
Breakfast: Smoothie
Lunch: Blended Salad
Dinner: cashews, Green Machine Soup, Pumpkin Pie Smoothie

Exercise: TWO 30 min walks with Cammie, 30 min Yourself!Fitness, carried all the kitchen cabinet doors up to the attic.

Fuhrmometer Reading: Kale

Thank you to everyone who left encouraging comments in the last few days. I never gave up but it did take me until today to get back to Kale. Monday and Tuesday were decent days but I didn't have excellent dinners. Today felt really good; and the Pumpkin Pie smoothie was so delicious, a great reward for a good day.

Libby came up with a great challenge to help get through the holiday season. There are a bunch of people on the Dr. Fuhrman member center already signed up. Here's how it goes:

"Each person goes about their day and records what they eat on their blog (or at the forum). When you don't have a perfect day, you have to pay the piper.

Your "days" can be measured according to Nicole's "Fuhrmometer". A Kale day is a perfect ETL day. A cookie day is a day filled totally with junk.

Kale days cost nothing
Broccoli days cost $1
Eggplant days - $2
Lentil days - $3
Blueberry days - $4
Potato days - $5
Brown rice - $6
Cashew - $7
Cheese - $8
Cookie - $9
On any given day, for each 30 minutes of exercise, you can earn back $1. (In other words, if you had a lentil day but exercised for a half hour, it would only cost you $2)"

So since today was the first day of the challenge and I had a Kale day; my tab is $0. This is a fun way to stay accountable during the Holidays. Please join in - the more the merrier!

week 24

Today:
Breakfast/Lunch: doritos, ice cream
Dinner: cashews, green machine soup, apple pie

Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie, 30 min Yourself!Fitness, 30 min treadmill

Fuhrmometer: Cashew


Well I had a crappy week and I paid for it. Up 4.4 pounds. I think that some of it is "real" weight and some of it is water weight. It doesn't really matter what it is; it's there.

I said something to hubby last night about being sick of junk. And I am. But for some reason this morning after having a really great workout I decided to blow the day by having the junkiest of junk for breakfast/lunch. It sucks. I really wish I had a time machine so I could go back in time and just make a smoothie...

It is so tough for me to have this kind of food in the house. I wish I had more willpower. I need to work on having more willpower. I don't want to be weak and give into the junk that I have access to. I want to have more willpower.

A positive note for today - my workout was awesome. I felt great and did a bunch of continuous running on the treadmill, something that I haven't done in a long long long time and something that felt very good. I think that it'll be something that gets better and better as I lose more weight and stick with working out. It really has helped the whole day not feel so bad.

'tis the season (of temptation)

This week turned out pretty bad for me. I really need to work on willpower especially because December is a month that revolves around food as much as it does shopping and gift-giving. In the next month I will have hubby's birthday, at least two and possibly 3 work related functions, as well as Christmas. That's a lot of opportunities to go astray, and this week and my time in Boston have shown me that I give up on the week all too easily and just say that I'll be back on the horse the following week. I don't want to do that.

I wrote a few weeks ago about wanting to really live the "food is for nutrition" mantra. It's not for lack of believeing in it because I do, very much. It is a hard thing to do to change the way one associates with food, for so long I have been conditioned to link food with socializing, comfort, celebration etc. It's very hard to erase those things and remember when you are facing your (old) favorite foods or are mentally and physically stressed out and exhausted. I am going to have to think about some way to actively change the way I associate with food so that I can stop falling off the wagon so completely that I have to run behind it for a week to catch back up.

So my goal for the holidays will be to approach things with the understanding that it is ok to have an off plan meal once in a while as long as it is at least partially sensible and that I won't let one meal turn into one day turn into a whole week. I also will think of ways daily to really start working FOOD IS FOR NUTRITION into my thinking.

I'm glad I'm realizing these things now instead of at the end of December. I think that as long as I keep these goals in mind I can have a successful month.

thinkin...

This week I have had a lot of compliments from my students at work and other people that I don't talk about my weight loss too. It's nice that people are noticing, and I am really beginning to see a difference in myself when I look in the mirror. It gets me thinking about where I'm headed and also keeps me committed to my goals.

When was the last time I weighed under 200 pounds? This is something I've been thinking about a lot lately. Until I started ETL I was never a fan of the scale. I preferred not to know. I can remember going to the Doctor's office and not looking when they weighed me. There are two instances that I can remember that lead me to believe that the last time I was in the 200 pound range I was in middle school (ages 12-14).

It sounds like a lot for a 13 year old to weigh 200 pounds. And it is. The thing is I'm pretty sure I stopped growing when I was 12 or 13. (Isn't that normal for girls?). When I think about my body at 200 pounds it's kind of weird because for so long I've been significantly higher than that. So to be this height and 200 pounds I can sort of see happening in middle school.

My first memory is kind of an unfortunate one. I have many memories of being picked on or made to feel like an outsider because of my weight, some of them still bother me sometimes (although not as much now that I am doing something about it) but most of them don't. I can remember in 7th grade waiting at my neighbor's locker so that we could walk home from school together and the boy that had a locker close to her would harass me every day. I can remember him saying "Nicole how much do you weigh... 200 pounds? 400 pounds?..." And I was mortified that he was right (not that I ever responded to him or let on). Later on in high school the same boy turned out to be rather nice after he started smoking pot... I'm sure he's forgotten about all of this, and I have too for the most part.

When I was in 8th grade I tried out Weight Watchers with my Mom for some sort of 6 week thing or something along those lines. I can remember losing weight on their plan and dipping below 200. For some reason it didn't stick and when I went back up I can remember it being a horrible feeling. After the 6 weeks or whatever were over I didn't try to keep it up and so the weight crept back on.

So it has been 13+ years since I've been in the 100's. What does that mean? Not too much except I have had this weight problem all of my life and when I do get down into the no longer obese category, life will be a very different experience. I don't plan to let knowledge of my past stop me or hinder me in any way. I know that I can achieve what I've set out to do.