Monday, December 11, 2006

six months

Breakfast: smoothie
Lunch: wrap from HFS
Dinner: hummus on pita, blended salad

Exercise: 30 min walk with Cammie

Fuhrmometer Reading: Lentil

No news to report regarding last week's weigh in. I stayed the same, which I suppose is ok for sort of going down hill at the end of the week. I missed my -75 by the six month mark, very disappointing. It has finally showed me that I have to stop setting goals like this for myself because despite my best efforts sometimes I just can't meet them. I am through with setting lose X amount by Y date goals and competing in challenges. The only goals and challenges I have anymore are to work as hard as I can to be as healthy as I can. I will lose the weight; but I will not impose a time limit on myself to do it in.

Today I was about to put the breaks on and say that I would just do my best for the next few weeks but not be so strict with myself. I was feeling so tired and burnt out about everything. I feel like I'm always running and I always have so much to do. This lifestyle takes a lot of time to prep the food and plan meals and exercise that I feel like I never get any time to just rest and veg out. My weekends are full and my weekdays are stressful. I just wanted some time to rest.

Then I looked at my pants. They look hideous... they are way too big and do not make me feel good at all. These same pants were so tight six months ago that I felt like a sausage stuffed into them. Not fun. And then I thought about the 4 pairs of pants from the Gap and the cute little herringbone pattern skirt that are hanging in my closet waiting for me to drop a few more pounds so I can wear them and I didn't want to coast anymore. I want to get back on the losing track. I want to be able to wear those clothes sooner than later!

I know it's kind of silly to be motivated by clothes but it helps me. Hubby and I were at the mall this weekend and it was nice to walk by the stores I used to shop in (like Lane Bryant) and say to hubby "I never have to shop there again!" It was also nice to be able to go to the mall and not feel as self-conscious as I would have before. Things have changed for the better by quite a bit and I've got to keep those things in mind.