Friday, February 09, 2007

Hey! So guess what? I’ve been totally sucking these past few weeks. I’m sure it’s no surprise since that’s pretty much what we all think is happening when we don’t hear from a weight loss blogger. I don’t think that it is a coincidence that I did my best with my weight loss when I was making it a priority to blog every day. I really need to start doing that again.

Tuesday afternoon I got a call from someone from asking me to be a guest caller on Dr. F’s internet radio show Nutritional Wisdom on Wednesday. The topic was “Why all diets fail” which I found a little ironic because I’ve been feeling like I’m on the failing side of things lately, but because I have a tough time saying no to anyone, I agreed to do it. For the rest of that day and the next morning I went back and forth with myself about actually doing it or not and thinking about what I would say if I did do it. Some of the things that went through my head were about how much better I feel both physically and mentally when I’m eating ETL foods and how much that it has improved my life. I did end up calling in and it went ok I think – the hubby says that he will use the recording of the show as blackmail fodder. In case you missed it and want to hear me being nervous out of my mind and probably coming across pretty geeky click here and select the 2/7/07 show.

I am glad that it happened because as I said it really highlighted the reasons why I’m doing this as well as the fact that it really works. Despite this I haven’t been able to say no to junk food lately either. I’ll do well for breakfast and lunch and then blow it by having a cookie or a totally bad dinner. I miss the feeling of seeing my weight go down every week instead of seeing the scale stay pretty much the same or go up.

I know that when I stick to ETL it works for me. So why can’t I just stick to it?

Not being able to stick to it just makes me feel bad about myself. Most of the time the food isn’t that satisfying and/or it makes me feel physically bad so why do I keep eating it? It’s not even a matter of not liking ETL food – because I do. I just have to stop. I just have to be stronger. I know I can do it, so I will do it.

An added incentive for me to really be strict with myself is that we just planned a vacation to a warm place for the middle of March – the time when winter has got you beat – and I’d really like to be able to buy some new clothes to take with me from the normal sized part of a store like Old Navy. I’m so close to being able to fit into the normal clothes and not the Women’s or Plus clothes and I’d really like to be able to do that for our vacation. I think that if I am back on track and really stick with things then I will be able to do it. I really hate setting goals but I just can’t avoid this one. I don’t think that it’s an unreachable goal and I’m not going to attach a target weight to it and I have a feeling that this is a goal that I am going to meet.